The Dragon


The Dragon is a mysterious enemy that plays several parts in the Epic Quest. It is first seen emerging from the ruins of New York, "screeching bloody-friggin' murder" (EQ:1:1).

Guitar Hero, who rose from the same ruins at approximately the same time, attempts to kill the beast with the gun from Rambo III. After his defeat, he spends three years in recovery, after which he sets out to form the B-Team.

While the B-Team's goal throughout the first story arch of Epic Quest is to kill the Dragon, they often get sidetracked. Shortly after the Chef's betrayal, he reveals in a log that the Dragon was guarding a substance known as The Cornchips of Warrior's Might.

At this point, the Chef desires the Cornchips, and travels to the Dragon's cave. However, decides that he should amass an army of Gravy Men before doing so. (EQ:4:4) His operations are postponed by various battles, alliances, and tomfoolery, and eventually the story progresses to a point where The Eggman, The Chef, Masta Cheif, and The B-Team all converge on the Dragon's cave.

During the battle, The Chef awakens the Dragon through various food-related... methods (EQ:5:10). The Dragon's very next actions are to destroy the false Yem-Shui Mk. IV. At this point, everyone wants to kill the Dragon, for it is the greatest threat. After absorbing the Cornchips, The Eggman slays the beast in one swing, cutting it into 666 pieces (EQ:6:2). This is by no means a sign of the Dragon's weakness; the Cornchips are simply unfathomably powerful. The Eggman then is written as having absorbed the Dragon's "soul," but it is made apparent later that the Dragon is still very much its own creature.

However, The Chef, using his powers of reincarnation (allegedly gained through the zombification process), raises the body of the Dragon and uses it as transportation (EQ:6:3). While it seems as though the Dragon has become enslaved, boymonkey130 reveals that the whole thing is part of some sort of sinister plan, and that the creature is no less their enemy than before. (EQ:7:17)

Guitar Hero then begins an attempt to slay the creature, but even a sub-orbital drop-smash from his combined guitars was only barely perceived as a threat to the beast. Any normal hit from his guitars is completely ineffective.